Dean

 

"God grant you the light in Christmas, which is faith;
the warmth of Christmas, which is love;
the radiance of Christmas, which is purity;
the righteousness of Christmas, which is justice;
the belief in Christmas, which is truth;
the all of Christmas, which is Christ."

Wilda English

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This song is a favorite of my husband Dean's.  While I don't think he has ever heard a version of it he didn't like, this is an especially beautiful one.

What Child Is This

performed by Sissel

What child is this who laid to rest

On Mary's lap is sleeping

Whom angels greet with anthems sweet

While shepherds watch are keeping?

This, this is Christ the King

Whom shepherds guard and angels sing

Haste, haste to bring him laud

The babe, the son of Mary.

Why lies he in such mean estate,

Where ox and ass are feeding?

Good Christian fear

For sinners here

The silent world is pleading

Nails, spears shall pierce Him through

The Cross  be borne for me, for you

Hail, hail the word made flesh

The babe, the son of Mary

So bring Him incense, gold and myrrh

Come peasant King to own Him

The King of kings salvation brings

Let loving hears enthrone Him.

Raise, raise the song on high,

The virgin sings a lullaby

Joy, joy for Christ is born

The babe, the son of Mary.

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Today is my sweetest of heart's birthday.  Every year, I recognize his special day in my blog with a favorite song of his, a favorite recipe and a love story.  We've been walking together, as husband and wife, for 46 years.  It seems like a long time, but it's really just a good start. I do not want to cause pain to those of you who might recently have gone through the death of a spouse or a divorce.  Please be aware that in the personal parts of the narrative, I will speak of our love. 

 Dean is joining me on my walk today. The assignment I gave myself was to find 5 scriptures about light and use them in our Christmas cards.  Dean and I recently accepted a challenge to read the 4 Gospels and the book of Acts this month, so we combined the 2 reading "assignments" together .  We read in the book of Luke today and marked scriptures with the word "light".  We were not able to find enough verses, so after we finished our chapters, we looked for more light references-- kind of a like a scripture hunt.  One verse which we particularly liked is found in 

1 John 1:5  This then is the message which we have heard of him and declare unto you, that God is light and in him is no darkness at all. 

~~Marilee

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Dean's Delicious Candy

1/4 c. butter or margarine

2 ½ c. sugar

2/3 c. evaporated milk

10-12 oz. vanilla chips

2-3 oz Neufchatel or cream cheese

5 oz. marshmallow creme

1 c. pecans or almonds, chopped

1 t. vanilla extract

1 t. imitation butter flavoring

Directions:

Line a 9 x 9" pan with aluminum foil and set aside. Let the cream cheese come to room temperature.

Heat milk at medium setting until warm then add sugar. Bring to a rolling boil (med-high) while stirring constantly with a wooden spoon. Add the marshmallow creme and butter. Bring back to a rolling boil for 5 minutes by the clock (start timing once the rolling boil resumes). Add the cream cheese to the boiling mixture about one minute before the end of the boil. Cut into sections to allow easy melting.

If you get brown flakes in the mixture then turn the heat down a little.

Remove from heat and add vanilla chips and nuts. Stir until creamy and all chips are melted. Now stir in vanilla extract and butter flavor. Mix thoroughly and pour into prepared pan. Cool. Remove from pan, remove foil, cut into squares. Stand back. 

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In John 15:12, we are told, "this is my commandment, that ye love one another as I have loved you."  Dean and I have had 46 years of good times and not so good times.  We have had incredibly joyous times and heartbreaking times.  We have laughed together and we have cried together.   We've gone our separate ways at times (I hide in the middle of our house, away from all windows; while he relishes being outside during lightening storms)  I watch Sci-Fi on Saturday nights, he goes and problem solves in another room on the computer.  He loves 4-wheeling on "treacherous" mountain trails and I close my eyes so I don't have to see the edges.   I use pens, he prefers pencils.  So what do we have in common?  A deep and abiding faith in our Lord and Savior.  We have tried to love and accept each other as Jesus commanded - "to love each other as he loves us"  - completely.  Marriage is ordained of God, and we want ours to last forever.  For our walk into the light today, we are going to start a blessing vase.  I've placed an empty candle holder in the center of our table with some slips of paper around it.  At the end of each day, we will write down on one of those pieces of paper a blessing which we received that day or something which we are grateful for.  It will go in the vase, then together we will read them together on Christmas Day.  I encourage you to join us and make a blessing vase/jar/basket of your own.  

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Isa’s Story
    as told to me (Marilee)

Dad returned from spending 2 years overseas in service to his God just in time for the Christmas holidays.  Their church had an annual Christmas Eve dance and my grandparents encouraged Dad to go.  He really didn’t want to – girls scared him!

When he got to the church, he drove around the parking lot, then around the block and then the parking lot again trying to postpone the inevitable.  On one of his “circles” he saw a girl get out of a car.   He watched her “dance” across the parking lot and knew that he had to meet that graceful, graceful girl!

Dad parked the car, went into the church and started his search.  I can see him in my mind.  He didn’t see her face, so all he had to go on was the way she moved.  He couldn’t even remember the color of her dress – just that it was a “floatie” kind of dress. Dad circled around the dance floor checking out all of the girls from behind.  He searched for a good 15 minutes before he found her.  Rejoicing, he asked her to dance.

He took her in his arms and asked, “What would you say if I asked you to marry me?”   

“No.”

“Why not?”

“You shouldn’t ask someone to marry you when you don’t even know her name”

“Ah, but I do. You’re my Cara, mia Cara, and whatever your last name is now doesn’t matter.  The only one that matters, is the one you’ll share with me.”

They saw each other every day until Mom went back to the Y.  Dad went to Stanford, and so their relationship faded.

The next year, Dad went to the Christmas Eve dance and saw Mom dancing with someone else.  He cut in.  He took Mom in his arms and asked, “what would you say if I asked you to marry me, Cara?”

“No.”

“Why not?”       

“Because you don’t know my phone number.  You can’t marry someone whose phone number you don’t even know.”

“Your phone number right now isn’t the one that matters, what matters is the one you’ll share with me. “

They wrote regularly after Mom returned to school, and the next Christmas found them back at the same church.  This time they walked in together.  When Dad took her in his arms, he said, “what would you say if I asked you to marry me?”

“No.”

“Why not?”       

“Because if I say yes, you’ll stop dancing with me on Christmas Eve."

“Oh, but this dance isn’t the one that matters.  What matters is all of the Christmas Eve dances we’ll share in our own home.”

They married 3 months later.

Every year we had a Christmas Eve dance.  Mom dressed up and Dad put on his best suit, and they danced.  How they danced! My sisters and I sat on the stairs and waited for our turn to dance with Dad.  Every Christmas Eve was filled with music and dancing.  Those memories are precious to me.   

When my husband asked Dad for permission to marry me, he said, “Only if you’ll dance with her every Christmas."  What a romantic he was!

I first heard this song in December 2004, shortly after my father’s death. 

This song is Christmas to me.

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Isa referred to Luther Vandross’s recording of Dance With My Father.  When I wrote her story, she asked me to include the song with it.  I found this version on youtube, and loved the video.  Happy Dean's birthday, everyone ~~ Marilee

                       
Dance with My Father
performed by Kellie Coffey
Written by Luther Vandross and Richard Marx